What is your WHY?
I have been a little absent the past few weeks as you may have noticed. As I took in the events in my life and witnessed the lives of various others this past week, I felt led to share my own journey this past 6 weeks that called me to "unplug."
Perhaps this will speak to you too?
I had found myself in an all too familiar place...yes, my plate was overflowing yet again. There was no space to breath keeping up with life demands. I became exhausted to be honest, and I felt it in my bones and in my Spirit. Too much!!! When I got alone with The Lord, He asked me this...
Initially I thought the "why" was in regards to my "purpose," but yet He calls me to answer a deeper WHY? A why that invades your personal space and makes you uncomfortable, but graciously gives you freedom to unplug to answer it.
I began to dissect my plate to see what was on it and why? Did He put it there or did I? Did it need to stay or could it bounce? Was the root to keep up with the Jones or to fulfill the call of Jesus?
After I dissected what was visible, I took the knife to the internal. I looked at my thoughts and the internal weariness of my soul and the voices pulling me in different directions and our conversation went something like this...
Why have you allowed yourself to get to a place of exhaustion?
Why do you struggle to simply rest? Remember my words to Be still....you have permission!
Why do you feel so pulled to be here and there? Did I send you or would I send you in two completely different directions?
Why do you carry such pressure to blog, write, post, like...etc? Do I lead or does the "platform" lead? Did you forget I am your CEO (Chief Eternal Officer;)?
Why are you allowing this thought to take up residence when you know you have the power to simply have another thought? Your easy prey when your tired, or did you forget?:) Perhaps that is why I call you to rest???
The whys continued to unfold as you can see why it took six weeks to clear my head.
I have grown to be pretty health conscious the last few years as I have watched many around me young and old fall prey to sickness. I try to be intentional about our health. On occasion I will drink certain waters or teas to "detox." I suppose the past six weeks were more of a personal detox. I detoxed the thoughts coming in and out. I detoxed some things in my life. I had to lose an attitude or two, and I had a remove a few things as well. I had to be intentional about REST! He does give permission for that:) Hallelujah!
I realized lost in duties that I had missed my WHY in many areas of my life. You can be working so hard to meet your goals for retirement and wake up realizing that you missed your kids. You can stay so busy updating your social status that you have missed out on the relationships that actually touch your life.
So I put my blog down and I picked up The Chronicles of Narnia and began an adventure with my boys. I became more present with my husband and more attentive to the needs of my teenager. I simply chose to be, and I am reminded that that was enough! Interestingly, when I found my WHY it didn't pull me from meeting with you here, but rather stirred a deeper fire remembering it. My WHY for being here is this..... The most gracious, lavish, loving and generous Father was relentless to bring this chick to freedom and I promised that I would spend all the days of my life spreading His Word to give Him thanks! Then sings my soul....HOW GREAT THOU ART!