What awaits on the other side of FEAR?
As I have written about our ability to come against fear these past few weeks, the desire to share a personal story with you keeps nudging at my heart. I easily lose focus, so I wondered if this desire was simply my restless mind always in motion, but then I see the thread.....it too speaks to fear or perhaps what fear keeps us from. Could it be that something rests on the other side of fear? Something more than courage or bravery? Could it be that favor is there too?
For me, part of my fear came from clinging to what I thought I had to release and trust that God’s plan was better. Somewhere along the way I had picked up the thought that a life pursuing Him would be empty or boring, for lack of a better word. A life of handing over your “want tos” and all of the “good” stuff that the world offered. It’s quite interesting to realize that I would have never envisioned the life I have now. It is so much more than I ever would have imagined or hoped for.
There have been moments of stretching. Moments of pressing. Moments of rewiring. Moments of awe and wonder. Moments of intimacy. Moments of victory. Moments taken by Grace, but absolutely without a doubt, moments of divine FAVOR.
If you have heard me speak then you have heard me share my crazy stories of FAVOR. The goodness of God has surely undone me more times than I can count.
This is another one of those stories…
It was near Thanksgiving last year when Todd and I were in a season of seeking God’s will. Where is God calling us? Would I move to him or he to us? Todd felt he was to come to me, yet no doors were opening in my direction. There were several factors to contend with...distance for one, he had a house to sell, we both traveled and lived feast to famine and desired stability, my children were younger and preferred not to move, but our town is small and has limited business offerings. My mind and heart whirling with scenarios on November 25th, I laid all of my emotions on the floor in hopes for divine wisdom.
The next day Todd calls, and I will always remember what his voice sounded like. “You want believe this. Someone wants my house and they haven’t even seen it and they need to be in next week?” This meant he could move to me, but what would he do for work? Aside from his speaking, he had previously won championships as a coach. Shortly after his phone call I receive news that a coach from our local school has resigned and his position is now open. How does this happen? Favor :)
Two days later was Thanksgiving, and unexpectedly almost our entire family came to town. Quickly, they started asking, “What are you waiting on? Why don’t you get married?” So with everything closed due to holidays unless, of course, they had a “black Friday” special, we gathered what items we could. It was comical as the day unfolded.....from buying Roses at Walmart and praying my mother’s friend could work a miracle with her added touch from picking up the cake and learning they completely forgot to make it. (I know you are cringing!) But on November 30th, when I heard him vow his love and devotion to my children and I, I realized that none of the details mattered. I don’t know if I have ever felt the presence of the Holy Spirit like I did that day, and I knew that it was as it should be, and we were now the perfect blended 7!
Of course, following your wedding you hope to leave for your honeymoon of bliss, but instead, we were packing and moving and trying to juggle schedules with holidays and kids. We were able to sneak away for two days to one of my favorite little towns before the reality of school and schedules called. With five children, how do you really splurge on a trip?
When January came I got an unexpected call from a precious woman that I met while speaking. She has followed my blog ever since and she wanted to give us a blessing.....
A trip to Kauai, Hawaii since we didn’t get a honeymoon. FAVOR!
Thank you Elanor (Frog) and Stan for blessing us! We are ever so grateful for you and for the Father that continuously showers us with His goodness.
We leave next week, and would love any recommendations of places to see while we take a much-needed respite:)
I share this story to ask you sweet friends, what if favor awaits you on the other side of your fear?