Week 5 : Becoming Whole: For Such A Time As This
Hello my beloved Esthers,
If you are just joining us, we are on a six month journey of healing and freedom believing it is a season for the release of an Esther anointing. There are layers to this season, so I encourage you to visit our Becoming Whole page to get the full details. For 9 weeks of this month, we are using Christa Black's "A Heart Made Whole" to walk through healing. This week we are on Chapter 4: The Reconciled Heart. I love how Christ says, “For love to be love, it must always be given a choice.” Love is a choice. Love can never be forced, and love never fails, but often in effort to protect our hearts we keep His love out. This week our goal is to begin reconciling our hearts back to His.
To Reconcile means to restore a relationship or bring back harmony. Often we don't even realize that our relationship with God needs restoration and we live with a half hearted christian experience rather than the fullness He sent Jesus to bestow on His children. We will get honest this week with our hearts seeking to restore our view of God and to reconnect our hearts to His. To reconcile our hearts, we must take some accountability. We must look truthfully at FREE WILL and have an honest assessment of who or what we are BLAMING for our pain.
It is interesting that the Reconciled Heart falls during the week of Yom Kippur or Day of Atonement. How blessed that we live this side of the cross and we never had to journey to Jerusalem this one day a year to offer a sacrifice for our sin. How blessed that the access to the Father is no longer limited to the High Priest, but available to us all. How sad that though we have this access and we have this atonement, but can live as if we have neither. My prayer for you as you journey through this chapter of “A Heart Made Whole” and as you seek to spend your quiet time releasing blame that you find yourself at the feet of Jesus with a heart of true repentance. For so many years, I viewed repentance as God’s way of disciplining His children. My view now is that it is a beautiful process that leads us closer to His Presence. Repentance means to change the way you think or renew your mind. I once thought this about God, but now I am believing this......
I was driving to an event in Austin, Texas with my husband a few years ago. We had been in conversation earlier with a couple that were mentoring a younger couple that were not married but had five children together. The man proceeded to tell us that when he asked the younger man why he wouldn’t marry this woman that had his five children the man replied, “I am keeping my options open.”
My heart wept. How could a woman be so desperate to stay with a man and have his five children and allow him to keep his “options open?” The conversation was just stirring in me as we drove. It was one of a million stories I have heard over the past few years speaking and ministering to women in desperate places over a longing to be loved and accepted. My passion is to wake up the woman inside of you that knows who she is and no longer becomes a magnet to such men and so freely gives her heart away! It is a burning passion within me. This is why my beloved friends in Joplin, Missouri now call me Sister Sassy Pants instead of Sweetea. They have met my alter personality that is more like a lioness than a Southern girl with her big hats and pearls;) You should all meet her;)) Back on track.... I am pouring out my heart to my husband as he drives confessing that I would never want to beg him to be with me nor would I want to be with him if he had even one other person in his heart. And then I remember like it was yesterday, I said, ”I love that you wouldn’t want to live without me.” And then as clear as I have ever heard the Holy Spirit He said, “So do I! So do I!”
This day became a shift in my life with the Holy Spirit. He doesn’t want to beg me or you for time. He doesn’t want to share your heart. He doesn’t want you to be keeping your options open for something better. He wants you to say, “ I wouldn’t want to live without you!”
Love is not love if it is forced. Love is a choice. Today, I just want you to ponder this thought.....could you live without Him? Are you living without Him? If you could stop seeing the life of following Jesus as a sentence and more like a romance, how would that reconcile your heart back to His?
Today, I challenge you to ponder these thought and allow the Holy Spirit to speak.
I will be in Honduras on Mission for a few days, so keep me in prayer!
Love to you all my beautiful sisters!