Day 18: Days to Your Eternal Husband

Day one (5).png

Good morning sweet friend,

I wrestled this morning with what to write seeing as I completely missed Day 17. Do I do two days and post them together, so that nothing is missing - feeding the people pleaser I have tried so desperately to let die? {Insert monkey with hands over face!} Do I skip it completely and see if anyone notices? Ha:) Or do I just simply confess that yesterday was a completely boundaryless day even though we are launching "Boundaries" at our church this Sunday, {insert monkey with hand over face!}  and instead of spending my morning writing twice actually use my boundaries so I can finish what I have for the day?  

I don't know if your life is like mine, but I'm guessing some of you feel the same....exhausted from trying to be all things to all people, or exhausted because you are picking up other's lack of preparation fear of letting balls drop, exhausted because you haven't put limits on your children and they are plugged into technologically while you're doing everyone's chores, exhausted because you haven't stopped to rest because the to do list never ends? 

Might I suggest...Boundaries! You have probably heard the word in conversation, and perhaps even read the book as I have in the past, but I feel the need to say, "Do it again!" My heart is to lead people to a life they love, and it will never be found in a boundaryless life that breeds resentment, exhaustion and even hopelessness. We begin to buy into the lies that my life will never get easier or this is the way it will always be and we settle much like the Israelites did with Moses for a wilderness all the while God is say cross over...there is a promise land!

I think the most spiritual thing some of us need to do right now is put healthy boundaries into place, because where busyness abounds there is no peace, there is no joy, there is no rest, there is no presence! When exhaustion abounds, we become easy prey! When resentment abounds, we destroy relationships and opens a door to bitterness which ultimately takes us from the life God offers due to our hardened hearts! 

Ephesians 4:18
They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because  of the ignorance that is in them due to a hardened heart. 

We will never get the time we need at the feet of Jesus to experience all that He offers living a boundaryless life! We will never be all God has called us to be if we are constantly pulling the weight of others that they aren't willing to pull themselves. It may seem the right thing to do or even noble, but it could be what keeps you from fulfilling the calling on your life. I can say transparently that it has certainly effected mine! 

I give you this wisdom today from the words of the authors Cloud and Townsend, take ownership of what you are responsible for:

Your Attitude and Beliefs
Your Choices
Behaviors
Feelings
Gifts
Values
Thoughts
Limits
Desires
Love

I love the serenity prayer that says:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change,
Courage to change the things that I can,
and the Wisdom to know the difference. 

We can't change people, but we can stop letting them control our lives and we can choose to be the change instead!

I am so excited that we have almost 90 people signed up at The Well to do a Boundaries Small Group this fall. I encourage you to join one of ours if you are local or find some friends and gather around a table and do it together! Working in ministry now for almost ten years, I have seen that unhealthy relationships will take people off of their spiritual journey and from their callings more than anything else! We can't deny or ignore the effect our horizontal relationships have on our vertical one! My words of advice....Go some boundaries and go vertical!

In His Grip,
Ro

Rochelle FrazierComment