The longing to be the BRIDE...


Having a daughter, I have seen the longing to be a bride from as early as she could understand the movie Cinderella. Yes, she loved to be a princess, but even more the princes “bride.” My mother made her a gown of flowing white tulle, so that she too could feel special, chosen, and set apart much like the leading ladies in her favorite fairytales. The dream never died just simply moved from fairytales to Pinterest where she and the rest of teenage girls plan away that “special” day. How most parents or any young man could live up to these expectations is beyond me with rings the size of football fields and chandeliers hanging from trees on ocean’s edge or much like one of her choices above where it appears she has created a sanctuary in the middle of the forest! {Help! This mother needs a new income strategy:) Ha!}

The longing to be the bride is in us. It is valid. It is deep, and it can not be satiated…..even in Marriage. You see as much we project this desire to be chosen, set apart, gowned in white and beautiful it has less to do with a horizontal union than most realize and more to do with a divine verticle one. As I have studied the scriptures, it is evident that we are called the BRIDE. It is evident that Jesus is the eternal Groom, but what we may be missing is the understanding of the Jewish Betrothal process at the time of the writings of scripture and what is speaks to the longing within us all today.

This was shared with me from a teacher in Jerusalem….

In the Jewish culture when a man wanted to marry a women, he or he and his father would approach her father and offer a price. If the woman’s father accepted the price and man, the man would now make the offer to the woman by offering her a cup of wine. If she drank from this cup, she was in essence coming into covenant with the man. If for some reason, they did not marry, they would actually go through a divorce, because the cup of this covenant was that binding. The man would then leave her with a gift and return home to his father’s house to make room for her. Typically they would add on to the family estate, and once it was ready, which often took a year, he would send for the groomsmen with the sound of the trumpet to signal his coming. She would have slept with a lamp stand lit with oil and her veil near her bed, so that she was prepared if by chance he came in the night. The groom’s party would know her from among her bridesmaids by her veil, and they would bring the wedding party back to the father’s home for a feast celebration. After this celebration, the two would consummate the marriage and become one. {I’m leaving out some details about the marriage ceremony because the importance here is the betrothal. }

In hearing this tradition and looking at scripture, it is evident that we live in a season of betrothal…….

You were bought with a price.

1 Corinthians 6:20

I give you the cup of the new covenant.

1 Corinthians 11:25-26, Luke 22:20, Matt 26:27, Mark 14:23

I leave you the gift of the Holy Spirit.

John 14:15-31, Luke 11:13 {The Gift}

He goes to prepare a place for us.

John 14:2

Make yourself ready, because you do not know the hour of his return.

Matthew 25:1-13

We will celebrate at the marriage supper of the lamb.

Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting:

For our Lord God Almighty reigns.
Let us rejoice and be glad
and give him glory!
For the wedding of the Lamb has come,
and his bride has made herself ready.
Fine linen, bright and clean,
was given her to wear.”

Then the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!” And he added, “These are the true words of God.”
— Revelation 19:6-9

So my dear friend, the pull to live out the fairytale…to be chosen, set apart, beautifully downed in white is valid but even with unlimited budget to meet the expectations of Pinterest, you still will never find this longing met. So perhaps we can release the impossible expectations on men, and begin to give our hearts back to the one who loved us so much He chose to die so that we might have a place at His table, not as a guest, but as His Bride!