It's ALL About YOU!
You have the words of James I'm sure......you know the words hard to swallow.... Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,whenever you face trials of many kinds James 1:2
JOY? I'm suppose to consider this JOY? I'm on the verge of falling apart, but I'm called to find Joy in this place?
I have heard this verse and feared it for years, but the past few weeks have come to cherish it. Is it possible that it holds such great truth...
because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking ANYTHING.
Something in me is missing. Something incomplete, so this one thing that comes against me now, may be the very thing that could bring me to a place of being made complete? The breaking. The struggle could be necessary?
A few months back, I opened up my arms and said, "Anything, Father! I will do Anything! Use me anywhere!" Of course, you hope that sweet surrender sends you on a mission trip with Compassion to a third world nation where you feel the need is ever so great, but what if He says, "Sure. I need you here, right where you are!" And what if it is in the place least expected......HOSPICE.
The last five years of my life have been spent seeking to bring dead to life, and now you are calling me to walk with the dying?
But I would surrender to the call and serve, even if I was unsure of what that looked like. And I would see need that I have never known (that is another entire day), and I would see Jesus like I have never seen before.
The first few days I would come home with tears so moved by women I have never known nor would I have known that were the closest thing I had ever seen to Jesus. Humbling themselves, they serve in a way that I am not sure I am capable. With loving words and hands and hearts they would love on, and wash some of the sickest I have bared witness. Their words would speak life and beauty and their touch would assure they were loved. I have felt it. And I am sure this is where Jesus would be if He were walking with us today. Loving on the hardest to love on.
I would also find myself ministering to families with no words to offer to answer their question of why? Why my loved one? We like this? What good comes from a stroke or Alzheimers? Some clinging to God more than ever and some running fiercely so full of doubt that a good God could allow this, and I sit waiting on words.....
And I seek His wisdom as I walk into a room of caregivers yesterday to share my story of finding God in a season of personal suffering. A woman that can stand confidently saying my pain was necessary to move me to the person I am today, and then His Spirit began to speak to me......
What if this isn't about their loved one? What if this is about them? What if this opportunity to serve and love and trust when it is most difficult is the only way I can get them more like me? What if this is part of My molding?
And I pose this to you......What if what is happening in your life is not being done to you, but for you? What if God wants to teach you to love like He does? Can you love your spouse when they don't remember your name? Can you love them when their life almost takes yours? Can you love your child even if they confess they struggle with homosexuality? Could you love your spouse even if they betrayed you? Could you love the one that has hurt you greatest? Could you love the one that may have taken your child? Could you love your father despite his absence?
Jesus would. And isn't His desire for us to be more like Him? He is teaching me that
HE IS LOVE. HIS LOVE IS SCANDALOUS. AND HE NEEDS US TO BECOME VESSELS OF THAT LOVE.
Could the circumstances of our lives, despite how challenging, give us new opportunities to be like our Savior? If so, it should bring us great JOY!
Something to ponder..... Ro